Jaanu Ajji - A Great Soul Lost Forever

11th July 2009 Night 11-30 PM. A Phone call brought an end to a four year suffering. It said that after suffering for about 4 - 5 years by bed souring, My Grand Mother ie My Mother's mother Janaki alias Jaanu had expired. The news of death brought smiles on all the members of our family as it gave a much longed relief both to the ailing Jaanu and also for the family that was looking after her. Death was welcomed with a smile.

Next day Morning Myself with my brother and parents rushed to Mysore. The complete Sosale famly to which my mother belonged assembled before 10 AM. From 11 AM the ceremony started and by Three it ended with setting fire to the pyre of my grand mother. Greatly relieved we all walked back home had a bath, and then our lunch.

Through out the ceremony, we cracked jokes, spoke openly and had a great time. There were more smiles on people faces than the tears. The reason was the suffering my Grand mother had undergone. A severe trauma from five years. she had been physically dead long before with just hart beat functioning. After a long suffering she had finally seen the Moksha and this had converted her death into a kind of happy moment for the entire family

Later after finishing the ceremony we left from Mysore back to Bangalore in the 5 PM Bus. During the travel time, i just recalled my association with great soul Jaanamma.

Janaki Bai was the fourth daughter to their parents out of the seven. She was the most beautiful in their whole family. She was the most charming girl of the entire T-Narsipur Town where she was born.

Most women agree with one fact that being too beautiful is not a boon but actually a curse. It creates a fear in the minds of parents when other appreciate their daughter, It increases possesiveness of the husband towards the wife and all these creates a huge mental torture in the minds of an orthodox good looking girl. My grand mother has suffered from it. The treasure of too much beauty was taken up as a huge burden by their parents and they wanted to get rid of it as soon as possible.

So in a sense of urgency, she was given to My Grand Father Venkatanarasimhachar, A powerful member of Sosale Vyasaraja Mutt at that time. My Grand Mother was his second wife (Some say it was third). After marriage, beauty turned my grand mother into a beast. She had six children. The first four were girls. As it is in our Orthodox Shastra a man does not get entry into heaven until he has a son. This forced my grand mother to go through six deliveries. After four girls two male children were born.

It was a sigh of relief for my grand mother. She thought at last she had fulfilled her husband wish to go to heaven. But unfortunately it happened very early. Still the children were kids, and my Grand father passed away leaving six children in the hands of a women whose life had thought her nothing except delivering a child.

The days of suffering started for my grand mother. With six children that too four girls in hand she went to the door steps of every relation. My Grand father believed that If we do good to God he will take care of us. With that intention he wrote all his property to the name of Sosale Vyasaraja mutt. The mutt people very cleverly wooed him and my grand father always thought about how he can achieve moksha and never thought about how his children can live in this world. This brought the entire family to the streets and from this my grand father might have gone to moksha in the eternal world.

With the help from her mother side, and from her brothers My grand mother managed to bring up the six kids. With great difficulty she completed the wedding of her first Daughter, Saraswathi. Luckily their husband could understand the difficulty of my grand mother and he helped in bringing up the other kids. He took initiative in getting the second daughter my mother married to my father.

However good the first son-in-law may be there was a kind of guilt in my grand mother's mind. She felt she had become a burden to everyone in this world. It is said that some even wanted her to enter into sati after her husband died, but due to her brothers bold steps she survived to look after the six kids.

By nature and Circumstances made my grand mother seee the world as a pessimist. she saw only problems in every solution. She always try to find the fault in people rather than the good deeds they were doing. This created huge problems in her life. She lost support of family members at the key points of her life. In fact as a kid, i did not attend my mother's brother marriage because of rift in my grand mother and my father. The main reason behind this rift was the pessimistic attitude of my grand mother.

However she successfully got all her four daughters married to four good families. Even his son got a good job and he was married. Luckily her son Mr. Gopinath got an angel as his wife. His wife treated my Grand mother virtually as her mother. Through out my grand mother life the person who supported her for maximum period was this great lady. In her last days, when she was bed souring, it was this lady who took care of my grand mother like a small child. She wiped all her wastes like a mother does for a small child. She never grumbled and till death she stood by the side of my grand mother.

When it comes to my relatiosnhip with my grand mother it started with my birth. When I was born, My mother's complete post pregnancy care was taken care by my grand mother. The first person in this world who washed me was my grand mother. She use to give me a very caring and loving bath when i was just a few days kid.

Actually my nose was flat. So they say my grand mother everyday before bath, patiently sat for about an hour and massaged my nose and body. Today everyone says the only best part on my face is nose and the credit for this should go to this grand mother.

In my younger days i was very adamant. Whenever i was not obeying my father, i use to get proper beatings and when everyone in the house were pointing fingers at me and were scolding, one soul is to bring its hand over my head and use to say, dont worry i am with you. This soul was my Grand mother. She always loved me, To be very frank when I reached the teenage, she brought my first girl into my life. She was responsible for that girl like me and motivate me in life. She had boosted me so much in front of that girl that she always thought that i was the best person in this universe. I got a good Girl friend because of my grand mother. Even she wanted me to be married to another girl. She always use to say you are the right husband for her. By this way even in my youthful days she helped build my dreams and my love life.

She was highly practical. She believed that in this world no one does anything without any return expectations. Sometimes she used to wrongly judge the returns people would expect when someone came to help her. By this attitude she was criticized by many. But life had made her think life as give and take policy.

Through out the journey i remembered this great soul. She had lived for 102 Years. Her past five six years were miserable. But she had led a life of 90 years dedicated to the service of her children and grand children. But we forgot those 90 years and remembered just the last 6 - 7 years and always felt she is a burden to everyone. I myself had spoken with that attitude. That makes me feel how mutlabi we are in this world. I really feel greatly bad when i feel that for a women who gave my first bath, who gave my first kiss, who gave me my first love, I in return gave nothing but just a homage in front of her body after she passed away. Well I now understand that the punishment to this attitude will be mooted to me after around 30 - 40 years and at that time i should remember and take up life as a reality fact that is the exact replica of what I had done a few decades ago.