Value of Life

24th December 2007 Morning I was as usual working on my computer and suddenly I saw my wife running and coming to me in total shock and despair. Seeing her I asked her what had happened ?Crying she opened her hands and I saw the pregnancy test strip in her hand showing two bands on it. I asked her what is it? Crying she replied I have conceived. 

 

Well you might be surprised why a wife has to cry for happy news of Conceiving. The problem was we already had two males and were happily enjoying with the other two of my brother. With already four children in the house, it was very shocking news. For a movement I got tensed. Being married from ten years we led our first six seven years as a mere compromise husband and wife and our relationship had just flourished well from past two three years and this was surely a result of it.

 

I was taken aback a little at this news, but my wife immediately consoled me that don’t worry, its just 35 days and it can be got removed very easily. She along with my brother’s wife immediately rushed to the Shoba Hospital. After waiting for three long hours the doctor there told them not to worry it’s just a 20 minutes process in which the embryo can be just pulled out using a sucking tube. 

 

However that day as there was too many patients they asked my wife to come and get the foetus removed on 26th December as the next day 25th December was a holiday

 

She came home and told me not to be very much worried and hearing it I also had a sigh of relief. In our house my parents, my brother and his wife, all of us just ignored this matter and decided to get it removed on 26th.

 

In between on 25th December something Unusual happened. As it was a holiday we all thought of having a outing and decided to go out for a movie. Welcome and Taare Zameen Par were the two choices we had. Somehow we thought of having a try on Taare Zameen par and even my sister's family joined the movie. We all booked the ticket through eticket from vijayanagar, and rushed to Abhinay Theatre. While Welcome film was running for block at Tribhuvan, Abhinay theatre had very average turnout and we all were little sceptic about how the movie would be. Later we sat in Abhinay together in one row with 15 members and by the time the movie was over there was a sudden change of attitude in all of us.

 

While driving back home, My father just told me, getting the foetus sucked is very easy, but just have a thought whether is it absolutely necessary. Then I just was memorising the song, "Main kabhi batlaata nahin par andhere se darta hoon main Maa" then my brother as a joke told me to imagine the foetus inside my wife's child as darsheel and think about the song, Main batlata nahin. 

 

Well when I just imagined my baby inside my wife womb, singing Marin kabhi batlata nahin, par abortoin se darta hoon main ma, Yu to main Diklata Nahin teri parwah karta hoon main Ma" tears rolled over my eyes. As soon as I came home, I took my wife on upstairs and we both heard that song for atleast 7 to 8 times, and suddenly we realized is it not a killing that we are doing ?

 

The next Morning, My father placed before us a beautiful option. We were planning to go for a Maruthi Swift Car costing around 5.1 Lakhs and has also had it checked at Yeshwantpur RNS Motors Showroom. My father told If we insist to go on car, then get the foetus removed or if we are going ahead with the foetus then lets drop the idea of going for Maruthi Swift. This economic burden can then be transfered on to bringing up the new child.

 

This triggered a new wave of thinking in all of us. Well the 5 Lakh Maruthi Swift a Man made Machine brings us a more powerful status and prestige in the society, but dropping it and going in for a third child will actually make us feel inferior in this society. as we would be the only one who would be having three children in our entire relations and friends circle with respect to our generation.

 

But the other question was is a Swift car is more worthwhile than a human life. We would pay an EMI of Rs.7000 per month for the new car for a period of about eight years, and if we drop the car now this EMI can be used as money for bringing up the third child. Swift or a child, the dilemma was hitting our heads. Later in my family everyone agreed that this decision is left to me and I have to decide and everyone would abide by what I would decide.

 

It was one of the toughest movements in my life. My wife told that she would sincerely abide by my decision. She was telling she had no interest in the third child but when she was saying that we could see her eyes wet showing her concern about her new sibling.

 

After a long thought I made up a firm decision. I announced the very next day that I would go for the baby rather than the swift car. I called the three elderly children achyutha, anantha and keshava, I told them you all like to have a car like my sister, but for that we have to sacrifice a new baby in Pankaja's womb. Or if we opt for the baby then they should forget the idea of a new car.

 

To my surprise all the three Told me “No dont get the child removed we want this child”.  I told them A new child means you will have a new competitor, for all your toys and you have to share everything with one more guy. Then both my children and my brother's son told they would not mind anything in sharing with the new child and they wanted it very badly. They all especially my elder son achyutha insisted to get the child. He even threatened that he would not concentrate on his studies if I get the child removed.

 

Hearing these sweet words I was very much convinced. Later my brother, my brother wife, My Mom, Dad everyone said they welcomed my decision.  I really felt very great to be born in this family and really felt very proud about the sacrifices that each one is going to make to get my foetus out as a living creature on this universe.

 

My wife first argued a lot. She discussed this matter with most of the people and around 80% of them suggested her to get it removed. Amidst of it, she obeyed my words. She told whatever may happen I will go ahead and deliver this baby.

 

She courageously faced the world during the next nine months and this brought a great transformation in her. She learnt the art of how to live for our self and for people who believe in us rather than living the life to please the outside world. 

 

On August14th finally the foetus that was supposed to be sucked by a tube, came out to the world as a new human being. It was a new life, a new creature on this universe. My mother who is old and aged, didn't care about her health and just stood by the side of my wife during her post pregnancy period. My brother's wife took all the care sacrificing everything just for the sake of this newly born child. Even my Wife's sisters and brothers and there families, My sister family, her daughter’s family provided very good support and we now have a happy family and one latest addition has now proved that its not a burden but an addition to our happiness.

 

This also increased my commitment level towards my family. I felt very very proud for my family, my parents and especially my brother and his wife. I  decided that I can never compensate the amount of sacrifice my family members made towards me and only way I can show some respect to them is through  my commitment for them. This added a new zeal in me and has made me more young and active at the age of 40.

 

All these changes happened due to one turning point. It was because of just three hours we spent in abhinay theatre watching a movie made by a Muslim . We are a staunch Orthodox Hindu family but our respect towards Muslim community rose from leap and bounds when we saw how one Muslim Aamir Khan changed our attitude and led to the birth of a new life on this universe. Shahrukh Khan says Films are meant just for entertainment but in my case, films were not meant for just entertainment but its sometimes even changes people's life. My case is a strong proof for this argument.

 

Man made Swift was sacrificed for God made life. Today we all feel that we are many many times happier with the new child than we would had been with the swift car. Yes Life has the greatest value and Happiness lies in our attitude to give value for every life in this universe.   I now strongly feel that God Made Materials should be valued Greater than Man made Materials

 

 

More Comfort means less Freedom

A Maruthi Van of 1998 Model in our house was the only luxury that my children were enjoying in their life. Whenever a latest Swift, Santro or accent zipped by the side of our age old van, I could see the passion for it in the eyes of my children. Seeing it me and my brother use to feel very sad and also had a dream to change our vehicle to some latest model with more comfort. 

Meanwhile, my Sister brought a new santro and since we are a close knit family, it meant to be a vehicle of our family. So my children were very happy that they could now travel in the new santro fuly loaded with all the features. The D day arrived and with full zeal my two children and my brother children were very eager to sit in this new vehicle.

My sister arrived in her new car, and immediately all my children rushed and ran across the vehicle enjoying its color and ambience. then it was time to take them on a drive. As soon as my sister opened the door, the children just jumped over the seats the way similar to what they use to do with our maruthi, due to the force, one of the knots of her seat cover just came off, and seeing it we all were shocked. Though my sister didnt tell anything, we ourself felt very bad, that the children's very first entry into the vehicle meant a damage to it.

Then we just asked all our children to get down, and in the anger I just smashed on the face of y brother's son anantha who is the most hyperactive of all. Seeing it the face of all my children turned very pale, they were then told that  they should not touch any item nor should move too much from their position in the seat. they all agreed.

We all sat inside and my sister asked achyutha to close the door, as a habit he pulled the door very hardly and with a big bang the door got closed. Everyone in the car were shaken. I got very irritated and just asked achyutha to get out of the vehicle. He asked sorry to everyone and promised he would never ever close the door in that way in future.

Then we went on a ride and through out the ride the children were very silent. they were afraid even to speak. they all very politely obeyed our words and behaved as a disciplined soldiers. Later on from that day my children always loved to travel in our age old Maruthi rather than the new highly loaded santro. Only when taken individually they liked to travel in santro and when they are taken together they all loved to travel in Maruthi.

This initiated a new feeling in me that our thirst for greater comfort in life drives us towards lesser freedom.  I could see that my children use to enjoy Maruthi van drive more than the santro because there we had put lot of restrictions on their actions. Its not just the case of a car. When we watch a film in our nearby Prasanna, Pramod or Veeresh theatre, my children shout, dance and even move around in the hall freely. they enjoy a movie to its peak.  However when we take them to PVR or INOX, we force a lot of restrictions on them. We feel embraced when our children shout, or move around in a theatre of that callibre. 

Adding to this is the latest security checks at bigger malls. the way our vehicles are scanned, we are subjected to manual checks and once my son asked when the theater owners does not trust why should we pay more and go to there malls. 

This makes me feel that the more comfort we try to acquire in life the more freedom we lose in our life. People may think this as a poor middle class mentality. but we enjoy the most when we travel in the least comfortable train rather than in a volvo or flight due to sheer freedom we enjoy in trains. When we are alone, comfort does matter and we can compromise with freedom. but as a family that too with a joint family sized with 11 members we always feel that the lesser the comfor we opt the greater the freeedom we enjoy.